The All-Too-Common Experience of Burnout

“You’re too young to feel burned out.”

That certainly wasn’t the response I expected. To be honest, the memory still stings to this day.

I was coming off of a particularly busy season at work and my first full year of being a parent. I’ve always been a self-starter, and I usually don’t have a hard time putting in extra hours or going the second mile at work. However, for the past several weeks, something hadn’t felt right. 

Usually, if I’m more tired than normal, an extra day or two out of the office or some additional time spent doing something I enjoy will help me regain my energy and get back on the right track. When I tried several things and still didn’t feel rested or recharged, I knew something deeper was going on.

Concerned about my inability to snap out of this funk, I began researching burnout. One of the first things I learned was that it wasn’t something to keep to yourself. If I was feeling burned out, I needed to tell somebody I trusted. 

Unfortunately, I chose the wrong person. I was expecting validation and encouragement, but I was immediately shut down and told that I hadn’t earned the ability to feel burned out because I was “too young.”

To this day, I’m still amazed at the level of ignorance in this response. Burnout, which the World Health Organization defines as “a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed,” doesn’t discriminate based on age. 

A 2023 survey from Future Forum suggests that 48% of 18-to-29-year-olds feel drained at work, while Gallup data suggests that professionals under 35 are disengaging at a faster rate than their older coworkers. This data leaves more questions than answers, but I share it to make this point: if you’re feeling symptoms of burnout, you’re not alone, and there is hope. You don’t have to live this way forever. 

It’s important to recognize that no two cases of burnout are exactly the same. While I have my own memories of burnout, your experience could be entirely different. In the past, most people only used the word “burnout” when talking about clinical cases that required immediate intervention. Today, the word “burnout” is used more frequently to describe different levels of dissatisfaction, fatigue, and stress. 

No matter what level of burnout you’re feeling, it’s important to take it seriously. The way we feel is often a lagging metric dictated by what we’ve done in the days and weeks prior, and if you wait until a point of significant urgency before addressing your feelings of burnout, you’re likely going to get much worse before you get better. 

The first thing you should do is talk with someone you trust. I shared my story at the beginning of this post partially as a therapeutic experience, but also as a cautionary tale. We must always remember that we don’t fully understand what someone else is seeing or feeling, and if somebody confides in us something sensitive, our initial response should be highly supportive and empathetic. 

Here are a few other steps that can help you climb out of burnout:

• Rest. If you’ve been running hard for a long time, it’s going to take some time for you to recover and get your normal energy levels back. Listen to your body and don’t feel guilty about building some extra downtime into your schedule.

• Do something that brings you joy. I love what Carey Nieuwhof says in his book, “Didn’t See it Coming,” as he talks about burnout: “Not giving up on life can help you get back into life.”

• Keep moving - however slowly. A loss of productivity is a typical symptom of burnout. Even if you can’t accomplish everything that you wish you could, you don’t have to have an all-or-nothing mentality when it comes to work. 

• Celebrate wins - however small. Burnout isn’t just about the pace at which you work - it’s about the level of progress or success you feel in regard to your work. Acknowledging the impact your work has can help foster a deeper sense of engagement and satisfaction.

• Don’t avoid big feelings. Your feelings are real and valid - even the uncomfortable ones. Suppressing them won’t make them go away. Instead, name the emotion and try to understand where it’s coming from.

• Be kind to yourself. Burnout isn’t fun, and it’s natural to want to get through it as quickly as possible. However, real recovery takes time. Offer yourself grace and understand that you won’t always require this type of special attention. 

Remember, burnout doesn’t reflect something inherently wrong with you. In our high-stress world where there’s constant pressure on each of us to perform, it’s an experience that’s relatively common. However, it doesn’t have to be the norm, and if you’re willing to acknowledge what you’re feeling and commit to living differently, you don’t have to remain stuck in burnout forever.